Moving On To A Merry Christmas

"We’re gonna have a merry Christmas, babe
A very merry Christmas, baby
We’re gonna have a merry Christmas, babe
A very merry Christmas, baby"

My favorite time of the year is starting to wind down and it is a little bittersweet. The candy canes and Christmas cookies always make me smile. This is always an amazing time to watch people and to love people. It is the time of the year when I see the most change. There is a change in the weather, I see changes in the people that love me, and I also begin to feel changes in myself. I love being able to look back at Christmas blogs and smile knowing how much I can grow in one year. I imagined 2010 would be a new decade and a fresh start. I guess I never imagined what that meant exactly. In the very first moments of this New Year I felt a change bigger than I was able to understand at the time. I learned that sometimes being in love and being able to trust someone are not things that coincide. Slowly like an umbrella blowing in a windstorm, my whole love story I created started dissipating. I traveled this way through the year with my head down and my umbrella broken. Assuming that the rain would also eventually dissipate.However by the end of an extremely rainy summer (metaphorically) and without the safety of my umbrella anymore I was ready to come in from the rain. Ready to move from the cloudy days to the sunny fall ones fresh with clean air and clean emotions. Being thrown into a deep puddle I had to close my eyes at times fearing that the wind would get too harsh, but when I finally opened them again I was greeted with a fresh blanket of white snow. With purity and newness, the flakes were fresh with possibility and a future without so many rainstorms.

I am happy to report that life is moving on well for me. I loved 2010 for all the painful moments, for all the memories I will eventually forget, and for the fact that it is only one year out of so many in my future. I also love 2010 for moving so quickly and allowing me to embrace 2011 with so much more excitement. Life is moving in its own time for me. For example almost a week ago I went on my first 'outing' since breaking up with my ex. It was chaotic and crazy. At the end of the night I thought that is was good experience and I would be on my way.

There is the funny thing about people. Sometimes they will surprise you. You can think something is so perfect and yet it is so screwed up. You can also believe that something is so broken that is can't be repaired, yet you might find someone who wants to fix it. So here is to the Merriest of Christmases. To the bubbly feelings a new boy will give you. For the giddy way he makes you feel just by being interested. Having someone actually fight to win your affection.

Well hopefully this will be a toast to all the words he said being true. To 2011 and to people that make you smile.

Merry Christmas to All!