Can’t Fight An Eclipse

This is an inspired blog: "The clouds I can handle. But I can’t fight with an eclipse."

My nails are painted blood red and I’m freshly pumped from recently seeing the new Twilight Saga: Eclipse movie on premiere night. I have always fallen in love with the books and how they tend to capture my emotional senses. The movies do a fairly good job of visualizing those favorite scenes. Even in the more highly emotional times of my life I think I love how they make life seem to float along. I have learned a really beautiful lesson this week also. It is truly astonishing how one moment can leave you feeling sad and drained of all the blood in your body; numb. Then suddenly you wake up from the nightmare to the sweetness of the sun and find something to uplift your former sullen mood.

As I am sure many people are aware of I’m a little excitable when it comes to the whole vampire thing. In other words I’m a nerd. However I’ve always been this way, slightly clumsy and a complete mess at times. I live in a crazy world filled with many unfavorable things. In a world where false people and things exist; not adorable myths. Sometimes this can make me let my emotions go and they take over my mind. I just hate being taken over by the awkward staleness society deems acceptable. Those stiffs tell us to sit still, look pretty, and shut up while the world around you crumbles beneath your feet. Making you watch while the world you’ve built up and every last thing you’ve worked hard for flutter away like a frightened butterfly.

That was last week. However with the newness of a brand new Sunday I realized that I still have things to look forward to. I still have ME to look forward to and moments to enjoy. I still have things that nobody will ever be able to take away from me. I don’t need to surrender, but I just need to understand my limits. Like the new Twilight movie I can handle the sullen clouds in my life and I can stand strong in the stormy rains. It won’t matter too much though because in the end it still won’t change anything. There is still an eclipse occurring within me, something in my heart changing from these new experiences. That the harsh feelings I may feel are being replaced and eclipsed by the love in my heart. It doesn’t matter how many chops a stupid guy may take at my character I’m still going to be able to live for more important things. Things such as faith hope and love. My love for Jordan is something that hasn’t wavered and as much as others try this situation has only bonded us closer. I will still have amazing friends like Lauren and Amanda. Things like those are things to live for and be grateful to have.

Last night was one of the best times intervals I’ve had in a long time. I went to the premiere for Twilight Saga: Eclipse, as I’m sure I’ve said earlier. I was blessed enough to get to share that moment with three of my favorite and the most marvelous people. The movie reminded me why I adore everything the world of Twilight has always offered me. When the harshness of the world threatens me like a dangerous meteor I am able to escape to the world of Forks and live inside of a helpless girl like me. I am able to come out as a stronger individual.

At the end of the movie Bella explains how she feels more complete. Even after all she has been through she understands the need for those things in her life. I agree with her a lot. Having an extraordinarily positive moment can really take away the pain form a extremely excruciating one. I feel more like myself, more together. I can always fight the sad clouds, but I can never fight with an Eclipse. Sometimes there are things that you can change in your life and other times there are things that you won’t ever be able to change. When you realize the difference then you begin to understand the sneaky little lessons. I can’t wait to go see Eclipse again soon and I hope one day you can find your little moments that make all your clouds go away too.