Fear Is The Heart Of Love

I woke up this morning a little punch drunk love. There were so many signs and answers to questions I didn't even ask.

First was the Chris Brown song, With You. Now normally I not one of those mindless KDWB rap listeners, but as I woke up I guess I just needed some sort of resurence that these feelings were what god wanted for me. So I gave god a wish, if this was still right that again he would play this song. When I turned on my radio, it was on and I had found that my wish had came true. The song was almost over, but it didn't matter. It still helped my feelings grow even more, to fall even more in love. I knew it was the sign that god wants to be in love, that it is ok. It made me believe in god even more, reaffirmed my faith.

Next I turned the station and Death Cab was singing about following into the dark. There was a certain line, the title of this blog, that struck me. "Fear is the Heart of Love." It made me see that god knows this is a new scary part of my life. That everything will be ok, because if I wasn't scared, then the feelings wouldn't be true, they wouldn't be worth it.

Suddenly after that the song became Hey There Delilah, our song. The song that shows me that heaven is on my side. That I have waited so long, like Delilah is waiting, to have feelings this strong. That even though I have also tried so hard not to fall in love it isn't something you can plan, it is something that just comes when you least expect it.

Last was Stop and Stare. I know I talked about it before, but this time it had a different meaning. The line "I know everyone gets scared." It helped me understand that this isn't a one way street unless I make it one.

So this blog is for you Jordy,

I love you